


the tapeworm fic you never knew you needed

by crimsondukemon



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: M/M, tapeworm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-23
Updated: 2020-02-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:48:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22854247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crimsondukemon/pseuds/crimsondukemon
Summary: ITS THURSDAYOR AS I LIKE TO CALL ITBIG DICK SUNDAY
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 9





	the tapeworm fic you never knew you needed

Good omens tapeworm fic

Its crowley who has the tapeworm

Aziraphale is pulling it out

Theese are my nostes 

Crowley climed through the windows of aziraphales bookstore. There was glass everywehre because he threw a brick inside the building. Crowley threw the first brick at aziraphales bookstore. 

“My goodness, HI crowley! What ever brings you here? :D” Aziraphale said it like he is gay people. 

“AZIRAPHALE,” Crowley hobbled over to him, “I HAVE A TAPEWORM IN MY ASS.” 

The other customers in the store gave him a wierd look. Aziraphale kicked them out for being homophobic. Progressive aziraphale! 

“Right. As i was saying. Theres a tapeworm in my ass,” crowley said again but this time 

aZIRAPHALE IM WRITING IN PARAGRAPHS THIS IS A NEW SENTENCE.I . DIDN’T FEEL LIKE FINISH IT. FUCK YOUR FRAGMENTS.

“Good heavens, it sounds like  **_GOD_ ** is having a very bad day today.” Aziraphale looked warily up at the cieling, pointing a finger up (NOT THE MIDDLE FINGER).

“Okay you dind’t have to yell at me :/” 

“You aren’t  **_GOD,_ ** you’re the sexy demon  _ crowley.” _

_ “THANKS” - CROWLEY _

“ANYWAYS, the tapeworm, in my ass.” Crowley said, part of the outline now.

“Oh, you foul fiend,” aziraphale said bashfully, “i have the perfect solution for tapeworms!”

“Thats why i came you,” crowley whispering.

“We have to wait until night, then the tapeworm will come out to breathe.” Aziraphale wig.

“Why night time? Also is that a wig?”

“The tapeworm come out at night to breath………..through butthole. Also no this is not a wig <3”

“When will you wear wigs?” Crowley asked sexily.

“Tomorrow in the morning after we get the tapeworm out of your asshole.”

“Okay lets sleep until night time when it come out to breath” -scrowly

SCROTUM

\----------------PASSAGE OF TIME

NIGHT TIME

[pathologic infection music playing]

[ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYwzxaGD6tg ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYwzxaGD6tg)

Aziraphale shook crowley awake

“Crowley! Wake up. Oh my god the tapeworm knocked him out cold. Good thing he already is butt naked.! And look at that, he put the tape on his hole already!” 

Aziraphale looked closesly at crowleys butt hole. Sure enough there was a little face stuck to the tape. It was chris redfieldd from the resident evil series!

“Why hello chris redfield, what are you doing in there?”

Chris wiggled in response.

“Lets get you out of there, you are, of course, one of  **_GOD’S_ ** creatures!” Aziraphale pulled the tape of. He throws the tape at the wall with a force unparalleled and chris redfield SPLATTERS. Not one of gods creatures anylonger [halo emoji]

Crowley wakes up.

“Aziraphel.”

Aziraphale: Hi crowley! Tpae worm out of ass <3

Crowley: wowthanks so much. Are we deterorating

W Aziraphale: we aer getting simpler <3

[snake emoji]: 

[angel emoji]”

END CREDITS

**ANNIHILATION BEGINS**


End file.
